I have a confession…I have blogger’s guilt. Mostly, when it comes to the frequency of posting. It’s not that I’m not reading, but rather my mojo when it comes to writing reviews or discussion posts has gone missing. Maybe my blogger’s mojo is on some island enjoying an umbrella drink and the warm sunshine, but I’d like it back. I have a stack of books that I read, but reviews need to be written and there’s zero inspiration.
Then…there’s the whole guilt regarding being a book blogger and keeping up with the world of publishing. Before when I was unemployed, it was easy to keep up and see what was going in the world. Now? Not so much. I feel so guilty when I miss book related events in the area and I feel like a failure blogger in that aspect. I know I’m the first to say, “real life comes first” and it does; while I wish it was real life getting in the way, it’s not. I just got over bronchitis (well 2 rounds since I had a week in between where I was okay then it hit again, but worse) and while I’ve gone a little over week without any real issues, I sort of feel like what is left is hovering there and I’m tired. Not just tired of the coughing and hacking but just overall exhausted. It doesn’t help the program director of the non-profit I work at wants me to work on some projects so I’m going in 30 minutes early (overtime just isn’t worth it) and I’m working my normal hours and working straight through lunch (difficult to find someone to answer the phones when you’re the admin assistant). I’m EXHAUSTED to the point that when I come home, I just want to sleep. I find myself napping for an hour or two after work then getting up to make dinner while I talk to my sister and feeding the dogs. Afterwards, I’m lucky if I can squeeze in an hour of reading or review writing. Most of the time I just don’t want to turn on the laptop. :/
So what brought this post on? A variety of factors, but mostly it was guilt that I missed two book signings I wanted to attend. Ava Dellaira was in town last weekend and I went to work on Saturday for a few hours to get started on a project and then afterwards came home and slept. I debated making the 30 minute drive across town to see her then realized she’d be less than 4 miles from me on Sunday. Did I make it? Nope. I opted to stay to work on blog stuff and catch up on emails. Then Laini Taylor was in town on Tuesday and I was super excited to attend, but then the dogs ran out of dog food and by the time I finished running that errand and buying groceries, I couldn’t summon the energy to go. Since then I’ve felt so guilty. I know I can’t be everywhere, but gah, I just wish I pushed myself into attending.
My dear friends, this is an apology letter as to the reason why I haven’t been back to a regular posting schedule. I just hope this exhaustion (not tired of blogging, just real life tiredness) and the mojo comes back.
If you’re a blogger, how do you overcome the guilt of missing events either real life or virtual?